A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

What is sticky and smelly - a stick

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

Q: There was a cinnamon bun and a cow out flying, one of them fell.. who? A: The cinnamon bun because cinnamon bun's can't fly.

Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

What's funnier than 24? Nothing, 24 is just a number. There's is nothing humorous about it. Go away.

Sex

A woman is carried out of a bar.

So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

Emergency call: - Please help, my little son swallowed a condom! 5 minutes later - It is ok, I found another one.

why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

Q: So I don't get it. Do women actually like not having penises and testicles? Do they genuinely enjoy it? A: Silly boy. Women ADORE not having penises and testicles. You just can't get your mind around someone having different preferences in anatomy than you.

A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

what did batman say to robyn before he got in the car?... "get in the car"

why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis.

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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