Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

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The Sentence Below Is True The Sentence Above Is False

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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rabbits running in my bathroom!

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

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Two Muslim men board an American Airlines jet. Nobody feels threatened and engage in friendly conversations with the passengers. The aircraft explodes due to poorly manufactured engine parts made by small starving children.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

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what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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A hat fell into the Indian Ocean. What happened to the hat? It got wet

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So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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