Racist Math Ahmed is on a train from D.C to New York the train is traveling at 125 mph. the distance between New York and D.C is 250 miles. How many will die in the blast.

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What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

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this last joke was a correction to the other one

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how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

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If Bob has 65 sweets and he eats 57 how many does he have? Bob has diabetes. He has high blood sugar, either because the body does not produce enough insulin, or because cells do not respond to the insulin that is produced.

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Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just got AIDS, And soon so will you!

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Women outside of the kitchen.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

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Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

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What's green and brown, and if it fell out of a tree on you it would kill you? A billiard table?

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I got pissed off at my little brother... So I threw him out of the window.

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why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

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Q:How many pancakes can you fit on top of as doghouse? A:Purple. Because ice cream has no bones.....

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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What did the guy say when he died? nothing, he was dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. At what point would a chicken consciously know it was crossing a road.

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A Jew, a Catholic, and an Aeithiest walk into a bar. The bartender look at them and says "Is this some kind of a joke?".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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