How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

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knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

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What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

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How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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Why did the little girl go to the hospital?........................Beacuse she fell when trying to steal cookies out of the cookie jar on top of the fridge.

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emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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How many black people can you fit into a cardboard box? Depends on how big the box is.

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black people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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