Neither have I

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Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

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Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

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89 bottles of beer on the wall, 89 bottles of beer, if one alcoholic passes the wall, 0 bottles of beer on the wall!

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The ten year old in my trunk

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

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Bob Saget

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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