Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

Knock knock whos there telephone telephone who telephone refiridgerator

Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

Why did billy have a bruse? Because he got smacked with a belt. -Louis

Q: Why was the mexican mowing the lawn? A: Because the grass was too tall

Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

Q: Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench. A: A bench is an object and a mexican is a human being.

A white man, a black man, a Mexican man and a Chinese man were on the same bus. The didn't socialize cuz that would count as racism

How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

The tall man says; How's theweather downn there? he's talking to smurf

Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

Why did the dead chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was dead.

a man walks into a bar and quickly notices a young lady having a drink. He sits beside her and asks 'why the long face?' 'My mother was raped by a horse.'

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

What did the pineapple say to the cucumber? Nothing...the pineapple was incapable of speech, for twas only an infant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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