Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

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Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

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I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

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What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daffodils are yellow, Flowers come in lots of colours...

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a man jumps of a cliff and ..... hits the ground

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A blonde woman is creating an account for a website when she gets the "enter the following" box. The box says"How are you". She looks down at the bottom seeing the answer and puts"Good!".

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What did one teacher say to the other teacher? We're both under-payed.

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A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

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Why did the Michael lose the race? Because he had no legs.

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Whats worse than a son killing his own father? His biological father finds him, 10 years later.

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when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. when life gives you melons, you are soon diagnosed with dyslexia.

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I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

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this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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Knock knock! Who's there? Me.

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Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

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Why did the little boy cry? Because his parents were shot in the face while he was forced to watch you insensitive jerk Now walk away ????

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#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

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knock, knock who's there? boo boo who? sorry i dont know anyone named boohoo so get the hell off my lawn

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why didnt little timmy finish his test he was eaten by a muslim rhino... .

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Charlie Sheen is winning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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