A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whos allergic to BS You R! :D

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock knock. Who's there? Tim. Tim who? Tim Smith.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Tall asians

thumb_up thumb_down +21

So a guy with a machine gun walks into a bank, makes a deposite and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops