What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

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A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

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Do you want to hear a joke? No.

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why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

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what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

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What did the Woman say to the man after he walked into the pole? That was a pole you idiot

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

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Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe, all mimsy were the borogoves and the momeraths outgrabe

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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Why is adam jackson so black when his parents are white? their was alot of black dick up their during the pregnency. (once you go black, you NEVER go back!)

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What did the mother say to her child that was washing the dishes? "Sweep the floor."

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What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

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Did you know that many scientists will find out what happens after death within your lifetime? But not their lifetime...

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So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he accidently dropped it.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

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why the chicken cross the road? because he just committed 3rd degree murder and was try'in to commit suicide

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I got a baseball bat can i talk to you ?

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops