Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the man buy kool aid? because it was on sale and he was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How did the farmer stop the chicken from swearing? Cutting it's head off, skinning it, plucking it's feathers and cooking it on a medium heat for about an hour. He then served it up to his family with green beans, mash and parsnips.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why do dead babies go to funerals? They don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why could the little girl not swim? She had rabies.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

In Soviet Russia, there was a population of approx. 293,047,571 people. It was dissolved in 1991, it is now know as Russia or the Russian Federation.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Lil Wayne

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? Jenga games regularly don't kill around 3000 people.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the boy say to his mum when he got home from school nothing he has no tongue

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

thumb_up thumb_down -2

You should read the Terms of Service.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

saw a free cat yesterday...it was dead on the side of the road

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops