What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A whole family go to a water park. They have a great day.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

thumb_up thumb_down +4

knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

thumb_up thumb_down +4

knock knock. no one's home..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? The jew is a human being while the pizza is a combination of things such as sauce, bread, cheese and many other toppings made available to the buyer

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the mountain biker say when he saw a double rainbow? This a very rare occurrence in nature, and I should enjoy this rare phenomenon.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops