Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

how to you confuse a blonde you ask her to recit the alphahbet back words

What happens when you drive down the road? you get to the end of the road

I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

What do you get when you cross a monkey and a fish? An unlikely premise upon which to base a joke

What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

united we sit, cause we're fat

Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

what happens when you throw a rock in the water? it gets wet

Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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