What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot lacked flying skills and experience.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

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roses are red so is ur face dont look at me like im a crazy bitch

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Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

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What did the audience watching inception say at the end ................ WAT THE FUK

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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What do you call a man with no friends? Terry

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What's black white and red all over? Steegers.

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penisvaginaorgasm

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A black guy and a jew walk into a country club, within minutes, they are told to leave and never come back in order to avoid being contaminated by the radioactive waste left by a landfill company cutting corners in safety regulations

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

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A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

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What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. At what point would a chicken consciously know it was crossing a road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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