Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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What is worse than the holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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why did the women give her sister a present because it was her birthday

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You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

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Useful Information: *2+2=5 *4+4=9 *6+6=13 Q: Given this information, how many fingers am I holding up? A: It was a trick question. Batman didn't open the door.

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What is black and has no education A tire.

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How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was tired of the people on the side she was on who told lame anti jokes, so she tried to stay away from them.

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Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

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Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Apple

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How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

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Why was the homeless man homeless? He lost his house in a terrible house fire, stretching throughout his apartment building, losing his much beloved wife and kids in the horrific accident.

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So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops