What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

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2 black people and a mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The black person because they decided it would save gas if they all carpooled to their job.

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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What's worse than a paper-cut? Two paper-cuts. What's worse than two paper-cuts? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three paper-cuts.

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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A man invented a time machine that didn't work. Because he wasn't a scientist, he was an ice cream man.

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My Butthole.

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What's long, hard and full of semen? An erect penis prior to ejaculation.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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What is not funny Bad jokes!????

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A black man, a Mexican man, and a cop are walking in downtown New York. So are tens of thousands of other people, because it is a very large and diverse city.

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A redhead walks into a bar. The bartender asks him if he wants a drink. He says yes.

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How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens live on farms.

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Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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Yo' momma so fat she buys clothingthat is bigger than most other people's clothing

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

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Whats greasy and long? Your moms chesthair

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely, caucasian man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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Why did the horse insult the postage stamp? He didn't. Horses can not speak English nor can anything verbally or physically critique a postage stamp and make it feel any emotional distress.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops