What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

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What happens when you shoot Chuck Norris? You go to jail.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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What's the square root of yo mama? That which when multiplied by itself equals yo mama.

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25

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

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Why dont blind people go skydiving? Because they dont live when they hit the ground

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So there's this big ass moose, and he walks into this grocery store, & asks the cashier "which isle are the potatoes in?" the lady replies, "down isle 5." so the moose walks down to isle 5 and there weren't any potatoes!

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Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

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why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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So, today I was walking down the street... I met a black guy.

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http://suckmytriforce.tumblr.com

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie

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what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

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What do you call a hispanic man hopping a large fence? A hispanic man hopping a large fence.

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I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

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What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

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What will ur wife say when she finds you in bed with a hore-s.

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What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

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Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

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- Knock, knock - Who's there? - Police - I'm not home!

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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