a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

Why was the man in a great deal of pain? Because he was hit in the face with a sack of potatoes.

KKK: Hey i was just comming over here to invite you to a church gathering me and my buddies are having later on tonight, and afterwards we are going to have a big bon-fire to fire up our spirits. Black guy: OK sounds great. White people sure are nice now-a-days.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

The tooth fairy, Santa and, Justin Beiber are the same, little kids believe in them, whats wrong with America these days

why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

Why are Chinese women such bad drivers? Only company executives are fortunate enough to own cars in communist China. Furthermore, women are still in a subordinate class in many Eastern societies.

Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

Why did the man fail to enter the CAPTCHA phrase correctly? Because he was actually a bot, and bots are typically prohibited from accessing information on most public web sites.

A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

YEAH! LIKE RELLEZ! XD Anyway, sure, it depends, you don't get voted as the most pointless man on Horse-head network without working some for it, but if really weird comments impress you, then sure. Honestly though, I might have been flexing my show off muscles a bit more than usual, as in posting more stupid stuff than usual, BUT, that is because when a MAN meets a sexy WOMAN, yet another one than his WIFE, his already boiling testosterone burns with flames... ...And yeah, where where we again? Oh yeah, you acting a bit bimbo, and me going "RELLEZ" just to make you aware... Then added this.

Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

Knock knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible...

Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

What do you call a woman that is on her period? -A girl that is expirencing a difficult to control flow of blood through the clitorus.

whats green and has wheels grass and i lied about the wheels

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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