What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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Where does the Queen of England live? England.

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If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

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A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

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How did the chicken perform the bank robbery? It was crossing the road and cluelessly walked into a bank, and EVERYONE in that bank had Chickenphobia so they just GAVE him the money...

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A dyslexic blind man

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Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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a child swallows a cleaning product, why is he given chocolate milk? to make him happy before he dies

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when debbie meets downer

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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What's worse than being fat? Being gay

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how many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one................ standing on a pile of dead babies.

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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ARGH! LADY THAT SNAKE BIT MY PECKER! YOU HAVE TO SUCK THE POISON OUT NOW! OMG SURE, err...Meh, thats not a poisonous snake... Oh... dammit! I mean phew! Ouch ouch ouch!

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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I don't always browse the internet. But when i do i prefer Anti Joke.con

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

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Doctor doctor, I feel like listening to good music. Looks like you need "The Cure" to help with this.

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What comes after 69? 70

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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