Roes are red Violets are blue I have a potato Let's make pie

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What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

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A blonde fails an exam because she did not study

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

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knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

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You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

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Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

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A man invented a time machine that didn't work. Because he wasn't a scientist, he was an ice cream man.

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What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

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What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

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Roses are red Violets are FUCKING VIOLET NOT FUCKING BLUE

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Wh do you call a Zeebra without black and white stripes? A horse

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Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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