What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Michael Brown

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This is sparta No this is patrick

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

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whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

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So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To go to work. And be sexually harassed. For 70 cents on the dollar.

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Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "GESTAPO! AUFMACHEN!!!"

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Guess what? What. This joke isn't funny

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What did the bird say when he was riding the turtle? Weeee...

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops