A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

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What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

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what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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If you took all the veins in your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You help him down.

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Obama

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I have to tell yo people a story and you have to answer it. Q/S(Story):There once was a boy by the name of aids. He had aids because he had aids. He dad had aids, his mom had aids his whole family had aids. How did he die? A: He got hit by a bus you heartlest basterd.

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Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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Why did the plane crash? Because, it's pilot was a bagel.

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What did the cop say to the black man being arrested? His Miranda rights.

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had leukemia

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

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What are the last words of a child dieing of cancer ? Nothing because he is to ill to speak

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What's black when its clean and white when its dirty? A black guy that rolls in flour.

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why wasn't the boy at his moms funeral? He killed his mom.

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What did the Jewish man say to the banana? Nothing, because he has common sense

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why is the sky blue? - because you have herpes.

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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