why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

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What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

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How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

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Wanna hear a story bout my uncle turza.... My uncle turza was eating fruit loops one day and there was a squirrel in the trre from 2 days ago he got angry because the spoon was from the phillipines so he punched a whole in the wall and his half uncle cousins sister had a cage.... True story

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Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

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Q: What do they call watermelons in Indiana A:watermelons

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What did the man say before he got stabbed? What are you going to do, stab me?

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What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a Scratch N Sniff at the bottom of a pool and tell her to sniff it.

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I don't mind gays unless they shove it down people's throats.

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Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

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what is Stephen Hawking's condom brand called? Anti-Virus

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Whats the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? Ghosts aren't dolphins.

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

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Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops