How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

What's worse than an ice cream cone falling over? The Holocaust. What's worse than that? Two ice cream cones falling over.

A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

What do you get when you come across a duck and a moose? Nothing...What do you think you deserve a prize or something?

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

who are the worlds fastest readers? the people who jumped on 911 cause they read 48 stories in 10 seconds

Is your daddy a thief? Because he stole my wallet.

life is a barrel of tomatoes...unless you paint them blue.

why did the little girl drown? because she was left unsupervized and had never properly learned to swim. she also had no arms and cancer.

Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

Knock Knock Come in Come in who? Come in...wait what?

What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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