your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

Your Momma is sooooo poor, she struggles day by day to feed you and your 8 siblings while keeping a roof over your head.

My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Why did Sally fall off her swing? -she had no arms knock knock whos there not Sally

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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