Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

What's the worst part of being a black Jew? That is a very uncommon combination of race and religion, therefore causing obvious confusion.

Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

How do you get a bird off the roof you throw an ax at it

why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

nick and a mexican were in a falling plane.. nick ate the mexican... that is all..

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

What's blue, red, and full of metal? Timmy in his favorite blue sweater, after he got hit by a truck.

What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

What did the black man say to the other black man? We both share the same ethnicity

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

A large commercial airliner is piloted toward inner-city New York. The plane is driven into the World Trade Center by a terrorist. The United States will now issue a holiday to mourn all we have lost in this tragic event.

Transformers: Shadow of the Dark Risen Monday. The Autobots starring in more explosions, more random fighting! Zero narrative nor explanations! One constant explosion trough the whole movie! But do not worry! Did you believe that the final battle versus Optimus Prime and his evil Dimensional counterpart Optimal Evilus would be the ones fighting at standing at the end? NO! This is far more exciting! 16 year old Nick is seeking the love of his life in the 42 year old grandmother Mirabella Torres, and ends up proving his love by pushing the button that instantly kills Optimal Evilus`s ultimate form Evilus Supreme! "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?" Honest reviews. "Yeah we love it that part where Optimus Prime forgets who is fighting and beats the shit out of Jazz and his totally non racist MonkeyBot Obamabus, seriously, this needs to die" Transformers lovers. "You gotta love that scene where Megatron starts blowing up his own allies because explosions!" Transformersmoviefans.com. "So why did Optimus Prime refuse to kill his Evil dimensional brother thing? I mean he was from another dimension, why did he go around like "NO HE IS MY BROTHER IN SOME DIMENSION! YOU MUST INSERT THE SPARK INSIDE ME DEEP INSIDE ME NICKY! DEEPER!" People Magazine. "So this time they just made the Decepticon`s weakness a button so small only a human can push it huh?" People... Just people. "MY EAAAAAAAAARSSSS!" MICHAELBAYGAVEMEPTSD.ORG. Moral: Wow it says skynet is watching all the time now at solvemedia, unexpected considering the first thing I posted was the terminator XXXV thing. So, is it some sort of easter egg feature? I mean I would not believe myself if someone told me that.... Which is actually what makes this kinda creepy...

How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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