What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

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you better accept "balls in yo mouf"...

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No.

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What is meant by the term 'Biological control''? Not ending up on the Jeremy Kyle Show.

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Why did little Jimmy go crying to his mummy? Because she was shot.

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A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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What's red and a cow? Red cow

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what is Stephen Hawking's condom brand called? Anti-Virus

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Ben Affleck

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Whats the difference of a pile of dead babys and a lambrogini? One of them is not inside of my garage.

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why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

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Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

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Link ate ink to make him sink.

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A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

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Yo momma so fat her pancreas doesn't work anymore.

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Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver? Cause she was blind, def, and mute. Thus making it difficult to drive.

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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