what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock Who did that?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock, Knock! Go away!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from K.F.C

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

''Today is Star Wars day :)'' ''Why's that?'' ''guess'' ''I don't know :/'' ''It's May the 4th!'' ''And?'' ''May the 4th be with you :p''

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops