Why did the blind man itch his knee? He has cancer

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

What do you call a doctor without a head? Deceased

Forgiveness is what weaklings beg for, while redemption is what the strong succeed at.

Q. What do you get when you cross a man, a bear and a pig? A. ManBearPig

Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

How do black people get rich? They collect welfare checks.

I viewed the terms of service and did not agree to them.

A man walks into a bar, he obtains an alcoholic beverage from the store neighboring this bar which he bumped into.

How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

Q: In 2900 A.D, why did the stars started blasting at each other and exploding? A: Because it was the time for "Star Wars".

A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

What is 9+10? 19

Q: what did Timmy get for his 8th birthday A: killed MR

Why did the little girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

Have you ever noticed how those little packets of sweetner are really handy to have around when you like your coffee to be sweeter than its default bitterness?

What is the Hardest part of helping a grandma who has having trouble crossing the road? Picking the gravel out of the wrinkles in her knees.

what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

This is the same thing you told me once, believe me, it helps holding into it.

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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