What did Charlie do when he lost his golden ticket? He killed his grandpa to get it back.

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How was Charles Manson able to get women to kill for him? Because he was charismatic and intelligent.

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what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

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There was an Englishman a Welshman and a Scotsman, all of whom were nationals of the United Kingdom.

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800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

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Give me time to think of a joke hm..............hm.................hm....................hm....................mmm....................hm?..........................m m.....................mmmmm..............hm...................hm.....................hm......................... ah!i don't want to think of a joke

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Right now I'm walking down a road shoot car rhendhhdgfgdyxchdhsggggggggggggggggggggggggg

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Whats the difference between and ? Blue custard

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Why did the Old man die? He died of old age.

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What happens when a right turn is finally made in NASCAR? The driver has successfully changed his tires and has been refueled, now he is pulling out of pit lane.

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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"what did the priest say to the rabbi?" "what" "my religions better

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Yo momma so fat she's obese.

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How many hookers fit in your bed? 12, if you have a king-sized bed, and 8.7 if you have a queen-sized bed.

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Q: A man, already drunk, walked into a bar. What did he say? A: Ouch!

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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What ever happened to Sally? We don't know she went missing over 5 years ago.

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What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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