Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

thumb_up thumb_down +9

/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A black guy NOT arrested for being black.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why is the sky blue? - because you have herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why didn't the priest move in with the two rabbi? Because having three adults between the ages of 18 and 65 occupying the dwelling would have violated their insurance policy.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I had friends on the Death Star.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The other day I went to the holocaust museum and it was horrible No air conditioning or cold drinks

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats brown and booky a book.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why are black people so good at basketball? they can SHOOT, STEAL and RUN.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops