A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

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A duck walks up to the lemonade stand. The man running the stand then smiles with a tear in his eye as he is reminded of when he and his now dead parents used to feed the ducks at a nearby lake every Sunday afternoon.

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

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Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the horrors of factory farming.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but hears my number so call me maby .....7 days

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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