What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

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roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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LOL -LOL GUY

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God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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Why does Santa wear sleigh bells? Because he's got leprosy.

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give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

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What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

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What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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