Remember those days where we planned what to do with our lives instead of wondering what things lied ahead? Those where the days, it does not matter if we are relics, heroes, or villains today. Back then, we did not seek to discover our future, we sought to create it, back then our people did not pray for a better day, but worked for it. And love and kindness was not something only found in heaven, but what we shared in what was the closest thing, to heaven on earth. Tell me the truth, are there many like us left in this world?

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Cannot tell, national security. As far as I care we are friends, therefore I cannot continue chatting with you for a while, its gonna seem pretty damn suspicious, I wont be repeating myself. Except again, do not worry, we will take care of this, and if not, I will contact you, you are not in any danger for the mean being, whoever are against us are looking for "Nero", not you, and I am pretty damn safe. By the way, I never lost an eye, but your "wiz" revealed himself by sharing that information, that part was the only ploy as far as I care, and it was necessary for everybody`s survival. Do not worry friend, I will call you sometime, but I recommend we stay off touch for at least 3 months, and that you stop using this site.

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How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

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the holocaust

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How is a hamster like a cigarette? They are harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

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When Chuck Norris dives into a pool... he gets wet due to the aqueous nature of the water

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Why the West African Rhino is extinct? They were never Horny

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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whats the best thing about life? whatever the best thing about life happens to be!

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How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You don't

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roses are red violets are blue get down your trousers cause im waiting for you

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What starts with F and ends with uck? Fire truck

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A blond, a brunette, and an Asian take a test. They all get exceptional grades and pass college.

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What do fat people and shinease people have in common? They both have a lot of chins.

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Q: Why did the black man fall off of the cliff? A: He was the victim of a hate crime and his body had to be dumped somewhere

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Q: whats worse than finding out you failed an exam? A: finding out you where Hitler in a past life

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What do Ping-Pong and Godzilla have in common? Both of them have nothing to do with budhism.

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Roses are black Violets are black I lost my eyesight at two years old and all I see is black.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a black man. A pizza can feed a family of five.

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What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

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What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion? Answer- Take me to your weeder!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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