Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

Up until today I thought eminem was the lead singer for maroon 5

What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

Knock knock. Get out!!

I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

If life gives you lemonade.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If You Bend Over Some More I'll Eat That Booty Too

What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

One night, a man was bitten by Dracula. The first thing to come out of his mouth was "Joke's on you, I have AIDS!" Then proceeded to laugh hysterically until Dracula snapped his neck

A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

Half life 3 confirmed

What is grey and cannot fly? A parking lot.

Q: What's very loud, has 60 wheels, and is covered in snow? A: A massive car pile up in January that was caused by a women being distracted while Texting. 7 people were killed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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