Why did the man take off his pants A: because they were uncomfortable to sit in

what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

why did katy fall off her bike?

One fish... Two fish... Red fish... I have AIDs

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Killing people is not illegal just ask a soldier

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A duplicate joke on anti-joke.com in an attempt to get thumbs up. Sad, sad people...

Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

John: I just ran over a cat... Just kidding! It was your mum.

What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "James" "James who?" "What the heck?You forgot me already?Its your bestfriend dude.Now let me in." ~Lil

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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