What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

That was me, I thought we where friends now... I am so sorry, I really did not send anyone nor anything, I would never do such a thing! What happened to you is terrible, I did say I knew who they where and that they are in prison, but that was a lie, I just wanted for you to think I was really confident and in control. Please Nero, let me speak to you, nothing is like you think, Jenny is my stepmother, please don't do anything.

What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

Q.Whats the differents between justin bieber and a girl A.Nothing

How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Sperm enters their vagina and fertilizes an egg cell causing a child to be conceived.

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

Knock Knock. Who's there? (Knocker runs for his life).

Q. What do you call a white guy with a black dick? A. Gay

"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

The asian parent's look at their child and say in an angry voice. "Y U NO DOCTOR." The kid was amazed how uneducated they were in english after living in america for 10 years.

How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

knock knock whos there? dave dave who ? dave starts to cry because his grandmothers oldtimers has restricted her from remembering her grandson dave.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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