Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

4 hours later.

What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

do you know whats worse than a bad joke on antijoke.com the holocaust.

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

...and the rabbit says, "How 'bout that schnitzel!"

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

what is big round and fat? Your MOM

knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I would like a rum and............ Coke." The bartender asks, curiously, "What's up with the big pause?" The bear looks down at his paws, embarrassed, and mumbles under his breath, "social anxiety."

Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

A dyslectic man walks into a bra. It was dark and he didn't see the laundry his wife hanged on the clothes line.

Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

what do an elephant and a mouse have in common? nothing

Sometimes Jamie wishes he could be a different person. He wishes he didnt have to eat dick everynight but it was all to late. He had to take it down the throat but he enjoyed the tickle it gave him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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