Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

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Why did the baby's bedroom smell so bad? The mom farted.

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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why did the blond have a broken nose? because she was brutaly beaten by five rapists when she refused to have sex with them.

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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Q. What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A. An horse.

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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Roses are red, Viiolets are blue, Get in the gas chamber, You dirty Jew.

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A cowboy rides into town and stays the weekend but then leaves on Wednesday, how is this possible? He was alive for the weekend and died on Sunday, his body left on Wednesday. Now get a job and be happy with your life.

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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a mother: my little boy always asks me to take him to see dinosaurs...but they are extinct. me: take him to a museum you dumb bitch!

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Robin, get in the car!

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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A black man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" He says as the Klu Klux Klan beat him with sticks

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

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Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

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how old is god? i don't know thats why i'm asking you. by: Brennan pickrell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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