What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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What's hotter than a beautiful girl in a bikini? Among many things, the Sun, the Earth's core, the inside of a volcano...

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Q: Why did the black man fall off of the cliff? A: He was the victim of a hate crime and his body had to be dumped somewhere

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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WHART++EWEEEEEEEP FLARPEN CARPEN FLARP

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

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A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

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Why was the man sad His got raped

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal

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Who should you call when your dad overdoses on Viagra. Child Support

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Oh wait! i don't care!

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What is a haiku? Are they hard to come up with? Obviously not.

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knock knock who's there? your destiny

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i woke up in the middle of the night and my entire bed was wet... know what i did? i layed a towel down and went back to sleep

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Why could'nt Ray Charles read: He was black

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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What did the POW say to his captor? I do not want to be waterboarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops