Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do homeless people get at Christmas? Cold.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

thumb_up thumb_down +21

10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the Black guy say to the Jew? Lets be equals

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A blone walks into a bank in New York City and asks the bank teller for a $5000 loan because she's going to Mexico for 2 weeks. The bank teller said he would need some security for the money. The blonde tells him her new Rolls Royce is in the parking Lot and she hands him the keys. The blonde gets the money and goes on her trip. Another employee at the bank then parks the car in the underground parking garage. He later ffinds out the blonde is a multi millionaire. When the blonde arrives home from she pays back the $5000 and $15 interest. When the bank teller asks her why she gave them a $250000 car for security or needed the $5000 loan if she was a multi millionaire, the blonde answers, "Where else can you park your car in New York City and expect it to stillbe there when you return?"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops