why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

How High is a Chinese man

Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

Your wife died during the delivery.

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

What's pink and when you press a button it turns red? A baby in a blender. What's pink and when you hit it against the wall sounds metallic? A baby with two forks stuck in its eyes.

Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

God wrote this joke.................................

What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

Roses are red, Violets are brown, F*** who's had a shit in my garden.

A black man walks up to a white man with a shaved head and boots in a bar He then hands him a ten dollar bill and tells him he dropped it

What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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