What did the brown guy say to the black person when he got fired? Nothing, did you think this was going to be racist or something?!

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

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Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

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Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

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How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

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What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

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Hi im a joke i eat turtles

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

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Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

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I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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