There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

Roses are red, violets are red. Aaaaaahh! My garden's on fire!

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

What did the underaged man say when he walked in the bar? He asked for a Coke.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

What do homeless people get at Christmas? Cold.

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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