Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into your grandmother and finding a fish

Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

A chicken crosses the road and goes into a bar and recites the following poem: Roses are red Violets are blue Knock Knock Who's there? Sugar is sweet Sugar is sweet who? And so are you. The bartender was confused considering she's a blonde. A genie appears and says to the Mexican he'll grant him 3 wishes. The black guy, the white guy, and the jew were at the bar also. The priest was also drinking. They all had a great time.

A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

Q: What's more silly than the idea of a wealthy, successful black man? A: A Clown

what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

Why did the boy have a rash? He didn't, it was a birthmark.

Two nerds walk into a bar. The effects of alcohol do not discriminate based upon the social status of said consumer.

What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...