A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

How do you call a black person in KFC? By a Phone.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

Whats the difference between a cow and another cow Help my dogs eating me

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

VaginaBoob ^.^

Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

A baby seal walks into a club. :|

What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

I did not thumb this up myself!... *click* Whoops! At least I am not that douche Moral Man eh? Moral: Whoops! Now if I just don't accidentally type in the answer and...

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

What is the difference between my right hand and my left hand? I used my right hand to stab your mother.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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