Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

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That's funnier than a zebra climbing the Eiffel tower with Bill Clinton on the 4th night of quanza

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I enjoy Popcorn

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A man walks into a vagina

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a. why? b. because

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what did the murderer say to the man... i'm going to kill you

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Chris is hairy

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? several.

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What do you call a man who does not burst into tears after hearing that his mother has died? A person that has been desensitized by today's cruel world and society.

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Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

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roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

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How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

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Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

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What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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