Yo Momma's so fat......... that she should probably start eating healthy and exercising more regularly or else she may be at risk of developing heart disease or diabetes

What floats in the toilet and looks like a log? A log.

What do you call 5,000 black people at the bottom of the ocean? A large quantity of African Americans who drowned to their death in the sea.

If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

A black man walks into a bar. No comments were said to him for everyone else was paying attention to their other peers.

what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

Justin Beiber sings. people don't listen.

Who did the dinosuar, that's pretty fricken awesome!

Uh Oh you just fell, So, So I've got one thing to say to you, And what's that Don't fall it gets you down!!!!!!!!

Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

What did the cat say to the bird? Nothing. It's a cat.

What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

1)Where do you find a turtle with no legs? 2)Where? 1)Where you left it. 1)... Knock Knock... 2)Who's there? 1)...Not the turtle...

The opposing forces behind all human beings is not light vs darkness, not good vs evil, but fear vs ' love. Whatever is overwhelmingly good for one person, is evil to many. Overwhelming darkness wont allow you to see. Overwhelming light will make you blind. You can never fear overwhelming love. You can never love overwhelming fear. These are the true polar opposites, part of all emotion that drive the human being.

Why couldn't my grandpa use a cell phone? He didn't have hands.

Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

"Where's your mom?' "She died last night. . ."

What do you call a man with no arms and legs? An amputee

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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