How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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Why didn't the ghost go to the dance? He didn't exist.

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pull my finger (farts)

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have aids, and now you do too!

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What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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Jebron Lames.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

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Why did princess diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing her seatbelt

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

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Please don't shoot me

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What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

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What did the the White blood cell say to the bacteria? Nothing. Its a cell. It goes through phagocytosis.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

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whats worse than 10 babies in a blender 1 baby in 10 blenders

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops