Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

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There was once a little boy... Boy: Daddy, I am so proud of you that when I grow up I want to be just like you! God: Son how dareth thou! That is a horribleth and shameful wish! I just called the adoption agency thy areth noteth my... er.. sonneth anymoreth! NOW GO TO HELL! Oh, and you get same powers as I by the way, just for Good measure or something, except I can destroy you whenever I want, I just do not want to because your evil will hopefully make me look good in comparison after I rid the world of the first testament anyways :P Boy: Yay? :( Where is hell by the way? Moral: That little boy grew up to become... SUPERMAN! While Satan never discovered what hell was since its a concept added by corrupt priests around the 1700`s in order to scare people into following their God instead.

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alert("Hello");

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Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

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Why did the little boy fall of his bicycle? It was the first time he road without his training wheels.

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Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

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My girlfriend reckons that a small penis shouldn't affect our sex life. She may be right, but I'd prefer it if she didn't have one.

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An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

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What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

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Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

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why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

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What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

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Knock Knock Come in Come in who? Come in...wait what?

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

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the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

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what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

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Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

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You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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