Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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What do you say to a rock? Meow

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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What do you call a cat that growls? A cat

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"Hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from up there?" "Waaaaaaahhhhh..." "Ok, let me kiss it better."

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When Chuck Norris dives into a pool... he gets wet due to the aqueous nature of the water

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Three nudists, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. No one finds it particuarly odd because the three are conscientious and wear appropriate clothing in public places.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they work hard at it

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What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

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Your mama is so fat. Just look at her.

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What is the difference between a snail and whale? A loaf of bread

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what taste like an apple, looks like an apple, but isnt an apple? an apple.

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What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What was the babies first word? Nothing: It was a still-born.

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Found out the difference between onions and men. I don't cry when I'm chopping up men.

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

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what is red and smells like paint red paint

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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