At 1:00AM, an old man is woken up by a knocking on the door. 'Knock knock' 'Who's there' 'An orange' The man opens the door to find a talking orange on his doorstep. The man remembers he has Schizophrenia and goes back to sleep.

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A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he (assuming he bears male reproductive organs) saw some corn on the other side (using the light rays refracted primarily by his cornea onto the retina) which is his staple diet as he is a herbivorous chicken. As corn is the producer of the food chain in question and the chicken is the primary consumer, a fox being the secondary and an angry farmer being the tertiary, he needs to ingest this food source in order to obtain the glucose required to produce adenosine triphosphate by the process of aerobic respiration in the mitochondria of his chicken cells. Thus, the chicken crossed the road.

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Whats Better Than Apple Pie Sweeeet Pie

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phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

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What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

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what is the diference between my left tit and my right tit .... my right one was cut off because of breast cancer

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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A Duck walks into a bar.

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What types of animals are the most dangerous? Dangerous ones.

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Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

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There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

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A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

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wanna here a joke? you.

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how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

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What did the kid with cancer get for christmas. Nothing. He was Jewish.

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Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

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Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

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Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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What's the dumbest animal in the rainforest? A polar bear.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

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If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

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Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops