- Anti Joke

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

What's worse than a joke. ONE TOLD BY FOK.

A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

What do you call a Black Man in the ocean? A scuba diver

Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

Mogok Papiti.

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

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How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

Little goldy locks was walking through a forest and stumbled across a nice cabin. She went inside and ate some newly made porridge and slept on the various beds that were there. The owners of the house came back from a stroll of their own and sued her for breaking and entering.

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

What do you call a three toed 9 foot man. His name.

What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

A man walks into a bar not a duck though

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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