How do you have fun while stuck in traffic? Play bumper cars!

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There would not be any me in we, you would have to hijack a media station, you would instantly be branded terrorists, and even if you where not, do you believe that you could have used the media in order to spread individuality, or would you simply have sought to control the masses like the rest? I am not saying that television is wrong, I am saying that as long as there are not enough people willing to think for themselves, and remain loyal to us and themselves, something which we failed at when we where at our greatest peak, then we are all media zombies eventually, and I do not mind, complacency is better than a constant struggle for survival.

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whats worse than school...wait a minute?

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Uber Driver: "Hey I'm close, where are you?" Me: "oh, I see you!" Uber Driver: "Are you that guy in the middle of the road?" Me: "yeah, floor it"

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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A blind man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He has gotten used to being blind all his life.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

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Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

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What do you do when you see a person sleeping at a bus stop? You fart on their head

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one time when i bought a sonic blast they gave me a regular? size spoon and i was like this is a huge inconvenience.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor. wheres my tractor

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Why did old Mary fall off the cliff? There were no brakes on her wheelchair

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An eagle and a mouse sat on a tree branch, watching a farmer walk to the pasture to milk his cows. The eagle then turned to the mouse but said nothing, because eagles cannot speak. The eagle then ate the mouse because it was a bird of prey.

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I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

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Q: whats worse than finding out you failed an exam? A: finding out you where Hitler in a past life

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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A:Knock Knock B:It's open

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What did the lady with Alzheimer's do yesterday She can't remember

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YOU WONT GIVE THIS A THUMBS UP!!!! YOU WONT DO ITTTT

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"Is this the Krusty Krab?" "Yes it is, how may I help you?"

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Why couldn't the Asian man speak in chinese? He never learned chinese

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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